Tuesday, April 25, 2006

A Few Reasons Why Philadelphia is Better Than Buffalo


1975 Stanley Cup Finals (you tried to blind our boys with fog, they said PHOG you!)

The Birds only choked twice in Super Bowls in two separate decades
Bills stunk out the first half of the ‘90’s going 0-4

We have Chris Matthews, you have Tim Russert

We have Kevin Bacon and all those people six degrees removed from him. You have Vincent Gallo all by himself.

We have ‘The Hooters’, you have the ‘Goo-Goo Dolls’, no need to expound

David “automatic” Akers vs. Scott “the wind took it right” Norwood

Our best football players only choke; they never committed double homicide in tight fitting gloves

You sleep with uglier women you never want to see again… Last call here 2:00 AM..... Last call Buffalo 4:00 AM

You only have a football and a hockey team to disappoint you every year. We have yearly losers in all four major sports and horses too.

You had Orel Hershiser; who was born in Buffalo, we stole him; raised in Cherry Hill, NJ he played for the little Flyers and would have been teased about his name no matter where he was from

You had Grover Washington Jr; who was born in Buffalo, realized you can’t play jazz in Buffalo and be taken seriously, then came to Philly. We also have that black dude Kevin who plays guitar for Leno and likes weed.

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