10. No barroom drunk ever wants to do an Elf toss9. When called vertically challenged, you reply “Vertically challenged my ass, I am an Elf biotch!”
8. The residuals from that Will Ferrell movie (no, not ‘Bewitched’)
7. Every night you can a bring a new toy for the wife to try out
6. Can hide your stash in the pointy-ass shoes
5. It beats being “a little person wrestler”
4. Get to fly around the world without being stripped searched by the TSA
3. You can whip out your ‘stocking stuffer’ without being arrested
2. At least once a year Santa lets you handle his sack
And the number one thing about being an Elf….
1. You always have wood
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